The story of my experiments with truth (The Rakhi Uncle allegation)

If honesty is a sin, I shall commit it.

"Rakhi Uncle"?

((July 2006-ish))

I bumped into someone on orkut through a community called "Desi Chicago". We were posting on similar topics on the community and I visited her profile. Asking me "why?" would be rather naive because orkut is a networking site and from her name, it was obvious that she was a south indian, single, with at least one common interest (the community). I reached her page and noticed that we had common friends from her school in the US and left her a scrap. I can assure you that it wasn't "can i make friends with you?" or "cute pic" or "can you add me as a friend?". It was some random response to one of her postings on the forum which I don't remember.

((August 2006-ish))

We started scrapping each other and it was just the usual orkut drill. We weren't flirting, but a curiousity scrap now and then. Harmless shit. We kinda got along well and I liked her attitude. She was no nonsense, seemed broad minded (which she is) and she kinda liked my writing style from my blogs. I was involved with CRY Chicago in organizing/collecting funds for a walk and she was super helpful. Again, it was a common interest, she believed in the cause too and she got her friends to contribute for me. I still owe her one for that.

What's important is, I hadn't hinted in any form or fashion that I wanted to date her and after talking to her on orkut for around 7-8 weeks, I wrote her a scrap in plain simple words suggesting that we meet. No tricks, no games, no hints. "do you wanna meet up sometime? let me know" types. She said she'd like to and she added me as a friend on orkut (not sure if this was before asking her or after) but the time wasn't right for us to meet. Either her weekends were busy or mine were crazy and I was looking forward to meeting her. I had spoken about her to couple of my friends when we were at a party and I'm sure they remember.

I invited her to one of my friend's parties and she was supposed to go with me but she was too tired from moving and called it off in the last minute. I didn't get upset, I knew she was dog tired that day and it didn't matter much. I met her a week later and I realized that she was gonna get married soon. That was the first time that I met her and I had barely gotten accustomed to her when I heard this. Actually, I was excited to hear her story because it wasn't any normal marriage. She was going against her parents for someone she liked and I was thrilled simply because I'm hoping to find someone myself too and spend some time with my "one" before I get married.

((October 2006-ish))

I told my friends that she was gonna get married and they were messing with me that I had received a "bulb". To be more specific, I was accused of hoping to hit it off with her and then feeling let down once I found out that she was gonna get married. I didn't care much because I didn't have any feelings for her and I didn't bother to explain. On the flip side, I really liked her company, her life story and the feeling was mutual. She enjoyed my company too. So time rolled by and she said she was gonna get married the first week of november and i was truly excited. I took a day off from work and prepped myself to attend her marriage and support her.

((November 2006, now))

Since last week, I've been accused of being a "Rakhi Uncle" by my friends, after they learnt that I'm taking a day off for her marriage and throwing her a marriage after-party. I was ridiculed as the "picker of sisters" from orkut and finding them grooms, shopping saris for them and being a pimp. All of that was cool by me expect how it was spun off. The general perception was that I was doing all this because after I figured that she was gonna get married, I couldn't pull off and I had to do this to make it up for my disappointment. I did get ticked off and my friends had a field day; Especially, my roomie. My enthusiasm and excitement for her marriage took a hit and all of a sudden, I was wondering whether this whole marriage-attending-party-throwing idea was a mistake, because I had known her only for a few months and met her just twice, maybe thrice.

I somehow managed to ignore the feeling and I figured that if i was in her spot, I'd be really happy to have somebody respect my marriage enough to take a day off to attend it and throw me a party. I decided to go through with it, whole-heartedly and let me tell you this, I'm really glad I did. I spent the whole day with the couple on the day of her marriage and I threw her a traditional, south-indian style after party which the couple definitely enjoyed. Hell, the party was supposed to end at 11pm or so according to plan and people left at 2a.m. It was a blast and I'm super glad that my efforts didn't go waste.

So, would I have wanted to date her if she didn't have a guy? Sure! Does that mean that I have feelings for her? Nope. There was no time for all that, we met, she told me her story and that was that. I did learn one good lesson, out of all this. If you know what you're doing and if you think its right, don't let "noise" get to your head.